Actions Speak Louder than Words
by SlayrGrl
Summary: RECENTLY REVISED ENDING. What if during "As you Were" Spike showed up looking for Buffy's help with the eggs? This is a fic for all of you who wanted to believe that Spike really was just holding them for a friend. S/B. FINISHED.
1. Deviled Eggs Should've been Hardboiled

**Title: **Actions Speak louder then Words

**Timeline: **Part way through 6.15 "As you Were"

**Summary:** What if Spike really had been holding the eggs for a friend and came to Buffy for help?

**Disclaimer: **All characters belong to the creator and writers of 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' no copyright infringement intended. This story was created for entertainment purposes only.

**Rating: **PG

**Parings:** B/S

* * *

**These Deviled eggs should've been Hardboiled**

The front door of the small two story house on Revello drive opens and closes. Buffy, Riley and Sam have returned to the Summer's house after an awkward meeting and killing of the suvolte demon. After some questioning and disappointing looks from Dawn they are getting down to business and settle into the living room where Xander and Willow greet them.

"So… What brings you back to town after you left suddenly with no word?" Dawn says pointedly at the soldier and his wife.

"Sam and I have been tracking a Suvolte demon through Central America. Killing machine. Nearly mature."

"Yeah, three months old and growing fast," Sam adds in.

"These things start to kill the minute they're hatched. And leave a real clear trail."

"Yeah. Just follow the villages with nothing in them but body parts."

"Uh ... Dawn, are you sure you wanna be around hearing all this?"

"Oh, come on, Finn, she looks all grown-up to me… That is, if it's all right with you."

"Uh, sure, yeah, it's fine," Buffy says a little surprised. It had been a while since she even thought of _protecting_ Dawn from the things they talk about in scooby meetings.

Buffy zones out a little as Riley and Sam talk about the Suvolte demon and its eggs. She could hear the excitement in their voices as they speak and something about every word each of them says just annoys her. Buffy added in a few comments as the conversation went on, but now it was starting to get off topic as Xander's enthusiasm about his engagement leads to questions about Riley and Sam's wedding. That was something she surely did not want to hear about.

Buffy's eyes direct themselves to the floor and when Willow notices Buffy's discomfort she makes snide faces at Sam. Riley and Sam sweetly smile at Xander over their wedding discussion and then turn back to Buffy. Willow instantly makes an innocent face pretending that she wasn't at all giving Sam the evil eye for Buffy's sake.

"So, demon eggs. Any timetable on when they're gonna hatch?" Buffy asks wanting to get the conversation back on track.

"Hatching's not the problem," Riley says.

"We think they're gonna be sold on the black market. There are some foreign military powers that would love to have their own Suvolte. You could never train it, but drop it on an urban population..."

"And it cleanses the area."

"Is that a nice way of saying it kills people?" Dawn asks.

"Lots of 'em. Money's been exchanged. There's a dealer in town, calls himself the, The Doctor…"

Sam says, but then is cut off by the sound of the screen door opening and smashing back into its frame.

The noise is heard through the house and all heads turn in the direction of the kitchen. Buffy's eyes go wide while Riley and Xander go on red alert standing up. They hear someone moving around and then all faces glance back at Buffy for a moment.

"What was that?" Riley asks.

"Stay here, I'll go look," Buffy says almost excited for the distraction.

Buffy stands up and walks through the French doors in the living room. Slowly she moves closer to the entrance to the dining room fully expecting something to attack her. Then just as she's about to walk through the doorway she runs smack into Spike coming from the dining room. They're both startled and each takes a deep breath of surprise.

"Spike."

"Slayer."

"What are you do…"

"Spike," Riley says from behind Buffy.

Buffy turns around to see Riley and Xander standing behind her. They are glaring with judgmental and discouraging eyes with which they seem to be attempting to burn a hole through Spike. Then she turns back to the vampire before her, she can see the sarcastic smirk creep onto his face and Buffy knows a snide remark is building up inside him at that very moment. Spike brushes past Buffy and gets right into Riley's face.

"And here I thought we'd run you out of town mate."

"What are you doing here Spike?"

"I should ask you the same question… Last time I saw you, if memory serves, you were getting the juice sucked out of you by some undead ladies of very questionable reputation."

Sam comes up behind Riley and puts her hand on his shoulder. Riley continues to glare down Spike. Neither is backing down and Buffy is starting to get annoyed with the show of ego. She steps closer to them so that she's looking at the two of them face off. "Spike, why are you here?" Buffy questions and Spike steps back. He brushes past Riley purposely bumping shoulders and walks into the living room where Dawn greets him with a smile. Buffy follows him with her arms crossed and Xander and Riley walk back into the living room but neither sits down. Spike pulls out a cigarette and is about to light it when he gets a disapproving glance from Dawn. He puts the cigarette back in its box and back in his pocket along side his lighter.

"What do you know about suvolte eggs?" Spike asks the group before him.

"He's the doctor," Sam says.

"How do you know about the doctor?"

"Where are they?"

"Wait a second now, I'm not the doctor."

"Where are the eggs Spike?" Riley says taking a step toward the vampire.

"I'm holding them for a friend."

"Alright, that's enough. No more games Spike," Buffy says stepping in to end the bickering.

"I'm not bloody playing games… I have a _friend_ who I'm in a bit of debt to, thirty kittens to be exact…"

"Kittens?" Dawn questions with a squeaky tone to her voice.

"yeah… and to clear my debt I'm holding the eggs for him."

"And just why should we believe you Spike?" Xander says.

"_I came here_ to tell you about them, remember that? I don't think I'd be looking for your _help_ if I were lying… now I've heard these things can do some considerable damage, so the question is what do we do about them?"

"Spike has a point," Willow says and Spike shoots her a smile thankful for someone to be standing up for him.

"Alright Spike, so where are the eggs and who is the doctor?" Buffy says in her all business voice.

"Eggs are at the crypt and the doc is an old poker buddy of mine."

"We need to get to those eggs right away," Sam says.

"Alright, let's go then," Buffy says.

--

Buffy and Spike sit in the back seat of Riley's SUV; as Riley drives he gives a displeased look into his rearview mirror staring where Spike's reflection should be. Sam notices his extreme emotions and can feel the discomfort in the air. Spike glances at Buffy, she has an uncomfortable look across her face, he doesn't like seeing her upset but knows sometimes she just makes it impossible for anyone to make her feel good. The four of them set off in the direction of Spike's crypt.

"I still don't see why _he_ had to come?" Riley asks.

"We are going to _my_ crypt need I remind you."

"It's not like you need to be there for us to remove the eggs."

"Don't forget Finn, he is the only one who knows what the doctor looks like."

"Right… kind of convenient," Riley says in an accusing tone.

"The doctor isn't Spike, Riley… it just doesn't make any sense, he's just… Spike," Buffy says in a huff trying to disperse some of her ex's discomfort.

"Right… deadly, amoral… opportunistic, or have you forgotten?"

"I'm not the sodding doctor."

"Can we just drop this, retrieving the eggs is the most important thing," Sam says hoping to end the conversation for good.

The SUV falls silent. Buffy takes a deep breath and glances at Spike then stares down at her fingernails. For the rest of the ride they travel speechlessly through the night. Everyone is tense and uneasiness floats thick through the air.

--

The door to Spike's crypt flies open with force and smashes against the cement wall of the crypt with a loud clamor. Riley walks in with his gun raised and a sullen look across his face, his posture is all business, he's followed by Spike and then Buffy and Sam. The crypt glows with the dim light from white candles that are spread around the room.

"Hey! Watch it mate, I don't fancy needing to get another door anytime soon," Spike says annoyed by Riley's intrusion into his home.

"Where are they?" Riley asks.

"Down below."

Riley walks across the room to where the cement cover to the lower level is. He looks around as if speculating that something will jump out at him, Buffy rolls her eyes at how every move he makes seems to be part of some tactical strategy and watches as Riley cautiously drags the cover to the side. From below there is a soft light radiating from a few lamps that Spike has illegally wired up. Their illumination makes the ladder to the lower level visible. Riley glances down below then looks back up at Spike.

"You first."

"oh _please_, you have got to be kidding me… right, cause I've rigged up my own home on the off chance that captain cardboard would fly back from nowhere so I could best him."

"It doesn't have to be intended for me for there to be a trap set up here."

"Well why don't you just stick your head down there and see for yourself… if something bites it off I guess you were right."

"Stop it! Both of you… I'll go down first," Buffy says ending the show of bravado.

"Buffy…" Riley pleads.

Buffy just turns to Riley and gives him a look that says don't question me. He shuts up and stands down. Buffy slowly moves down the ladder and Spike follows giving Riley a smug look just before he descends. Sam also has an annoyed look to share with the soldier before she follows Spike below.

--

Buffy's feet disturb the dusty sediment that lines the floor of the crypt sending a small cloud of dust up to swarm around her shoes. As she looks out at the lower level of the crypt she sees about a dozen beach ball size, grey, scaly eggs covered in a bright yellow goo. Buffy didn't know what to expect, but this sure wasn't it. Spike comes down the ladder behind her and once his feet hit the ground Buffy turns to face him giving him a look of bewilderment. Then Sam and Riley enter the lower quarters of the crypt behind them as well.

"Good, they haven't hatched yet," Sam says.

"You didn't keep them frozen?… we have to hurry," Riley says.

"Hurry with what?" Buffy questions.

"Here," Riley says as he tosses Buffy a silver cylinder shaped object.

"Put the end up to the egg and hit the button, it'll freeze them," Sam says as she puts her silver freezing cylinder up to one of the eggs and hits the button making the egg freeze over and turn white with frost. Sam pulls the silver cylinder away to find that the end of it is now covered in yellow slime. Buffy makes an ew face as she watches the yellow slime drip to the floor. Sam then moves on to the next egg while Buffy and Riley do the same with the eggs as Spike looks on.

"Hey what about me? Don't I get a neat little egg freezer?" Spike asks mostly just with the intent to annoy Riley.

"Sorry Spike, all out," Riley says a little sarcastically.

"Yeah, I bet."

Spike just rests up against the wall and pulls out his smokes. He lights a cigarette as he watches Buffy bend over and freeze eggs. His eyes roam over her curves and Riley notices him watching her. Then Sam notices Riley's protective face over Spike watching Buffy, however, no one says anything. Spike leans away from the wall and drops what's left of his cigarette to the ground smashing it with his boot as the last of the eggs are frozen.

"Right, so we're done here then?" Spike asks.

"Yeah, we just need to carry these out to the SUV," Sam says.

--

Buffy picks up the last egg. Its frozen shell makes her hands cold but she doesn't care. She turns around and walks towards the ladder. Just as Buffy is about to take the last egg up to the SUV Spike steps in front of her, it's just the two of them down below. Riley and Sam have both carried eggs up to the SUV and Spike wants to take advantage of this opportunity. Buffy gives Spike an annoyed look as he gets in her way, but he doesn't budge.

"So what's with soldier boy showing up all of a sudden?"

"Sam and him have been tracking that suvolte demon thing across the country and it lead them here."

"Right, and he just needed to look up his old flame for help?"

"What are you jealous?" Buffy questions as she moves past Spike to the exit and starts to climb up the ladder.

Spike walks up beside the ladder and she stops climbing. He's looking up at her now and while somewhere deep… deep inside her Buffy thinks it's cute that he's jealous she doesn't let anything show in her emotions beside annoyance. Spike looks at her and knows she's right about him being jealous, not that he'd ever admit it. He thinks for a moment about saying something snide to prove to her that he was not at all jealous and even runs through a few sentences in his head; but then he sees something in her eyes. There's hurt there, sure she hides it well, but Spike knows its there.

"Must be hard to see your ex prattling around with someone new… _but Buffy_… that bird's got nothing on you. Soldier boy doesn't know what he missed out on."

Buffy had been expecting a comment far more sarcastic and smiles at Spike's kind words. Sure Spike could be annoying and vulgar, but every now and then he did something that really made Buffy feel good. Every now and then he did something sweet, something honest and what meant the most about those small things was that he did them completely selflessly and without any self serving motive. Buffy continues up the ladder.

* * *

A/N: While I am still a fan of the "script format" I'm moving away from it. I still think its a great format to use for fanfic, but I want to be a novelist one day and fanfic is good practice for me so I plan to revamp all my fics and break my "script format" writing habit.


	2. Still not Over Easy

**Still not Over Easy**

Riley and Sam are talking when Buffy exits the crypt and places the last egg in the trunk of Riley's SUV. She closes the back hatch just as Spike walks out of his crypt to meet Buffy, Riley and Sam outside. He notices Buffy glance at him and for the first time that night feels like she's let her guard down a little, maybe his compliment earlier actually meant something to her. Then Spike looks to the Finn's and allows smug features to creep across his face as he see's Riley's all business attitude.

"While it was a _real_ great time seeing you again… oh wait, it wasn't, guess you have to be getting on your way then," Spike says taking a few steps toward Riley.

"Not until after you take us to the doctor," Riley replies.

"Forget it white bread, you got your eggs now get gone… thought you were good at that?"

"The doctor poses a serious threat to all of our safety, he's dealing dangerous items into the black market… we have to stop him," Sam says.

"Spike, who is he?" Buffy asks returning to her _lets get this done_ tone.

"You can all forget it, giving up those eggs is one thing, means I'm still out thirty kittens, I give up the doc and I can forget about ever playing poker again," Spike explains and then watches as his statement obviously pisses off Buffy.

"This demon is selling off eggs that could be used as some twisted from of demon warfare to knock out entire populations and _you're _worried about your poker game?"

Spike knew instantly that he was in hot water, Buffy had that _what are you thinking_ tone to her voice. He tilts his head as he turns to look at her while Riley and Sam look on at the two of them. Buffy's head is cocked to the side and her arms are crossed as she stares Spike down. There was no arguing his way out of this one. Spike takes a deep unneeded breath.

"Fine," he says unhappily and gives Buffy a _there are you happy now _glare.

--

Again Buffy and Spike find themselves sitting uncomfortably in the back of Riley's SUV. They are on their way to the demon bar where Spike plays kitten poker. At the moment Buffy is letting her mind wander away from her slayer related duties. Buffy finds herself thinking about Dawn, things at home were tough for her at the moment. Everything just seemed hard, relationships were strained, money was short and there always seemed to be things she was forgetting. Jelly. From that line of thought Buffy remembers that she was supposed to stop at the grocery store after work and get among other things grape jelly for Dawn's lunches.

"Shit," Buffy says commenting out loud on her random thoughts.

"What is it?" Riley asks.

"Is something wrong?" Sam adds in.

"What… no, no nothing's wrong, I just remembered we're out of grape jelly."

"Did I miss something?" Riley asks.

"Dawn, I try and make her lunches for school and she won't eat plain peanut butter sandwiches, I was supposed to pick her up some jelly, but then with the demon… I just forgot."

"Do you have bananas?" Spike asks directing his question to Buffy.

"Huh? Uh, yeah… What does that have…"

"She likes peanut butter and banana sandwiches… you should toast the bread a bit first so they don't get soggy, and cut the bananas the long way, she said they don't fall out then."

"Oh… how do you know that?"

"The bit and I spent a lot of time together while you were… _gone_… I know a lot more then you think, love."

Buffy's a little surprised. She forgets sometimes that while she was dead everyone else was here moving on, everyone else was still living. She forgets just how long she was gone and that while she was gone Spike stayed. Even without Buffy there to make him do the right thing he helped out. He looked after Dawn. He kept his promise. Buffy wasn't the only one surprised by Spike's comments, Riley also now has a slightly perplexed look across his face and Sam glances at her a little confused herself. Although Sam at least finds herself feeling a little sympathetic, Riley can't wrap his brain around Spike's actions what so ever.

--

The SUV pulls to a stop outside the demon bar. They were in the bad part of town, sure that only consisted of about two blocks of town, but it was vastly different from the good part of town. With the exception of the bronze the bad part of town was the location of some pretty seedy places and many evil run establishments. As the SUV pulls to a stop a demon with scaly green skin is thrown out the door of the bar and lands with a thump on the ground. Those in the SUV watch as the creature stumbles around drunkenly and wanders off. The sound of drunken demons and bar fights resounds down the street and the smell of yak urine and coagulated blood floats through the air.

"Where are we?" Sam asks looking around.

"Just one of Sunnydale's finer demon run establishments," Riley explains to his wife.

"This goes on… right out in the open?"

"One of the many perks to living on a hellmouth," Buffy explains.

"Well, let's get going," Riley says.

"I don't think that's such a good idea mate… if the doc sees me walk in there with the likes of you he'll disappear faster then you can say crew cut… Buffy and I can go in and find him; I suggest you and the misses wait here," Spike says with a bit of spite directed at Riley.

"Spike has a point… people in places like this notice when something's out of place," Buffy agrees

"Should you really be going in then, I mean wouldn't the slayer in a demon bar raise suspicion?" Sam asks.

"Oh, I've been here before. It's no big."

Both Riley and Sam look back at Buffy with confused faces that ask the question _why were you here_, and Spike glances over at Buffy with a smirk creeping across his face remembering the drunken night they spent together. Quickly panic sets across Buffy's features as she thinks about the questions that could be forming in Riley and Sam's minds. She worries that they'll suspect something going on between her and Spike.

"Strictly on slayer business of course," Buffy says fumbling over her words slightly as she offers her excuse. Buffy's eyes move back and forth in their sockets as if looking for a sign that tells her they bought her reasoning.

"Right… well, shall we go then?" Spike asks breaking the tension between Buffy and her thoughts.

"Yeah… we'll be right back, keep an eye out on the street for anything suspicious."

--

Spike walks into the bar with a swagger in his step making his leather coat sway as he moves. Buffy follows behind him and notices that as they enter all faces turn to see them. They receive a few evil glares but no one starts anything. All Buffy has to do is look in the direction of one of the demons and they instantly avert their glares and pretend like they're extremely interested in something else. Without a word they make their way to the back of the bar and vanish into the back room.

They enter the back room to find a round table with three demons sitting around it playing cards. Buffy recognizes Clem, but not the other two. One has grey skin that looks slippery like that of an octopus or some other sea creature. He also has large black eyes that give Buffy a slight case of the wiggens. The other poker playing demon is a bright yellow color with spiny like things coming off its head, Buffy looks back and forth between them wondering which one is the doctor.

"Hey Spike, Buffy… You guys want in?" Clem says glancing up at Spike and Buffy from him cards.

"Not this game mate… Were looking for the Doc," Spike responds.

"He's not here," the demon with octopus skin says.

"Yeah, I can see that… where is he?"

"How should we know?" the yellow demon asks rudely.

--

Riley waits restlessly in the SUV with his wife beside him. His eyes are glued to the entrance of the demon bar. Within the vehicle there is a stale silence that overcomes this couple. A stale silence that sits so thick in the air that not even Sam's glaring eyes can penetrate through to Riley.

"To the casual observer one would think you're being overly protective over her," Sam says and finally Riley turns to face her.

"Sorry… it's just Spike, I don't trust him."

"Buffy seems to trust him enough; I think she knows what she's doing."

"Right, working beside a cold-blooded killer, yeah she knows what she's doing."

"Is there something you're not telling me about?"

"Like what?"

"I don't know, but ever since we ran into this Spike guy you've been… I don't know, _off_."

"It's just… do you see… never mind."

"What? The way he looks at her, how he flirts with her the way a boy does in grade school by teasing, or how she acts annoyed but then gives him glances when you're not looking…"

"She gives him glances?"

"Are you jealous?"

"What, no."

"Whatever it is Finn, get over it."

"Right, you're right… I'm sorry, I've been…"

"What's that?"

"What?"

Riley turns to look out the window where Sam is staring into the night. He turns just in time to get a glimpse of something moving past his vision and jump down into the electrical tunnel.

"Come on," Riley says as he exits the SUV, Riley closes his door behind him just as Sam exits the vehicle. Together they cautiously yet quickly walk toward the sewer like entrance to the electrical tunnel.

--

Spike has the yellow demon pinned up against the wall. His leather clad arm is choking the creature as he stares him down with a menacing glare.

"I can smell that he was here, so now would be the time when you tell me where he went." Spike says.

The demon attempts to choke out an answer and Spike loosens his grip slightly as he's unable to make out the demon's words.

"He left… said he was taking the tunnels out of town," The yellow demon says with a raspy voice. Spike give an evil smile and then punches the demon in the stomach before turning to leave.

"Thanks mate," he says as he walks out the door following Buffy.

When the two of them get back out into the bar area Spike grabs Buffy's arm and pushes her up against the wall, he looks down at her with lust in his eyes and runs his tong over his teeth. Buffy looks up at him annoyed.

"What are you doing," she says.

"I know where the Doc is headed love, figured we had a minuet for ourselves," Spike responds.

Buffy looks over his shoulder at the bar full of demons behind him.

"What don't fancy kissing me in front of a crowd… trust me they won't mind."

Buffy knows he's trying to push her, trying to pull their relationship out into the open. She fights her will as hard as she can to walk away from him, but he's looking down at her with those deep blue eyes. He nears her tilting his head as he does. Buffy offers up one more moment of resistance, but he's persistent as always and she gives in.

--

Buffy and Spike exit the bar just in time to see Riley and Sam running into the alley and opening up the sewer like entrance to the electrical tunnel. Instantly they take off running following after them.

"Buffy, over here," Sam yells as she sees the blonde duo exit the bar. Buffy looks back to glance at Spike and then keeps going, she makes it to the electrical entrance just after Sam jumps in. Buffy doesn't even hesitate to follow after and Spike is right behind her.

"He went this way," Riley yells as he runs down the tunnel followed by his wife, Buffy and Spike. They travel down the electrical tunnel, the sounds of their feet hitting the cement reverberating through the air, then they come to a four way intersection. Riley stops unsure of what way to go and everyone following him comes to a stop as well.

"Which way?" Sam asks.

"I don't know," Riley replies with defeat in his voice.

"Doesn't matter, you're not going anywhere," A voice says from behind them.

All four spin around to see that they've been followed by a group of demons; Buffy and Spike recognize them from the bar. "We're here to protect our investment, the Doctor's got some work to do for us," the demon says in a low coarse voice. He has small horns extending from his head and rough dark skin. While this one is large and built in stature his followers vary in size. The one thing they all have in common, however, is the ripped and worn leather attire. The demon swings at Spike since he's nearest to him and then everything turns into a full on brawl.

They're out numbered and while all four of them are experienced fighters Buffy and Spike are they only ones with the strength to really compete. For a while it seems that they may be overcome by the enemy, but they keep fighting. Buffy snaps the neck of the demon she's battling while Spike is still going at it with their leader. Already Buffy is being attacked by another lackey and soon she has two demons to fight at once. Riley and Sam seem to be holding up for the moment each battling a demon and working off each other to fight effectively. Spike manages to take out their leader and spits at his body as it falls to the ground. One of the lackeys that Buffy is fighting runs away as she kills the other and Riley and Sam manage to take out their fair share of demons as well. Now they stand alone in the tunnel once more. Riley and Sam take a few panting breaths while Spike wipes blood from a split lip, and Buffy looks over all of them.

"Great, now what do we do?" Sam says reminding everyone that they've lost the Doctor's trail.

"Spilt up, each take a tunnel," Riley says speaking with authority in his voice.

"Better idea. I know where he's headed, follow me," Spike says then turns from the group before him to walk down the tunnel.


	3. Look at the Sunny side Up

**Look at the Sunny Side Up:**

Spike leads the way down the tunnel. Riley follows closely behind him wary of whether or not he's actually taking them to the Doctor. A part of Riley wonders if they're wandering into a trap. While it's become obvious to him that Buffy seems to trust Spike, although he doesn't understand why, Riley will never trust him and with every step the vampire makes Riley is right there behind him watching his every move. He wonders why it is that Spike is even still helping them find the Doctor; he could have just left when they were back at the bar. In Riley's mind there has to be some conspiracy as to why the vampire is leading them down this tunnel.

"Where are we going Spike?" Riley asks.

"This tunnel leads to the docks, it's the best way to get out of town in a hurry and the only reason you'd be headed this way is to escape town."

"Why should we believe that you're not leading us into a trap?"

Spike stops and spins around to face Riley. The two of them face off. Spike moves with a swagger as they walk in circles.

"Do you ever bloody stop?"

"What's your agenda Spike… and don't tell me you tagging along out of the goodness of your heart?"

"What's it to you? I'm here to help that's all."

"No, that's not all… why Spike?"

"What? Think I've got some monetary compensation headed my way out of trading in one of my buddies? Slayer stopped paying me years ago… or maybe I'm trying to build up some brownie points with the bird, tried that for a while, didn't work so well… hard as it may be to believe I'm not getting anything out of this, and while I don't give a damn about you, the Slayer and I have come to a meeting of minds so I'm not looking to put her in harms way anytime soon."

"Right, you and Buffy, you're just great pals now. I find that hard to believe."

"Alright, let's stop this," Buffy interjects.

"Let me handle this Buffy," Riley says.

"You know what white bread; I wouldn't expect you to understand."

Spike gets real close to Riley's face and tilts his head so that his lips are near his ear.

"It's like I've said before, the girl needs a little monster in her man," Spike says in a whispered yet cocky voice; although it's soft it's still heard by all.

Punch. That was Riley's last thread and Spike cut it, he hits Spike so hard that he goes reeling back. Spike's lips is split open again as his back hits the wall of the tunnel. After a moment of surprise Spike regains his balance.

"This will be worth it," Spike says as he throws a punch at Riley hitting him even harder then Riley hit him. Then Spike yells in pain as his chip is set off sending electrical signals of agony through his body. It's at that point that Sam walks away and continues down the tunnel obviously fed up with their actions.

Buffy walks up to Spike and Riley and glares at both of them as they touch the sore spots of their bodies.

"Are you two done, or should we waste more time instead of finding the Doctor," Buffy says then walks off following Sam leaving Spike and Riley to recover on their own from their short fight.

--

Buffy catches up to Sam in the tunnel. So far they've just been walking a straight shot and haven't had to worry about what way to turn. Spike and Riley are still far behind and a part of Buffy wonders if they've killed each other yet, at the moment though she's too annoyed with both of them to care.

"Hey," Buffy says as she catches step with Sam and walks next to her.

"Was he always like that?"

"Riley or Spike?"

Sam laugh's a little. She turns to Buffy. There's something about Sam that just makes Buffy want to like her.

"You know… he was ripped up inside over you when I first met him… It took him a year, but then I really thought he was over you."

"He thinks… I let him go."

"Since we've been here I've been starting to think that maybe he never let you go."

"Sam…"

"No, Buffy, it's okay… I know he loves me. It's just the way he's been acting… I'm embarrassed really."

"Don't be, Spike… he knows how to push people's buttons, especially Riley's… it's not all Riley's fault."

"Spike… he… you and him have a thing don't you?"

"What? No, no… Spike and I just…"

"Its okay Buffy, you don't have to hide it from me, I get it… Spike's…"

"Evil, undead, annoying…"

"I was going to say honest, endearing, straightforward… Yeah, I can see on the outside that Spike is… a little rough."

"That's an understatement."

"…but he's not like other vampires… I've fought evil things Buffy, maybe not for as long as you have, but one thing I've learned is that it's not as simple as good and evil… Riley likes to live in this black and white world sometimes… I guess that makes things simpler, but that's just not how things are... I'm just saying, you shouldn't have to feel like you need to hide anything. If he makes you happy that's all that matters."

"He doesn't make me happy."

"Not ever?"

Buffy's caught off guard by Sam's question. She finds herself thinking about her relationship with Spike. She thinks about how she broke down to Tara weeks before confessing everything. Tara had said the same thing about him making her happy and Buffy remembers giving Tara a similar answer. The simplest way for Buffy to explain her relationship was that it was just to make her feel. She was just sleeping with him so she could feel something, anything, but deep down Buffy knows there's more to it then that. Nothing's ever that simple. Not Ever, Sam's words resound in her head. Spike has good things about him and Buffy knows it, he genuinely cares about her and Dawn. He did what he could to look after them and even stayed around after she died. He would never be the most moral person, but yeah sometimes he did make her happy. Sometimes she really did like him. He really could cheer her up, when he wasn't being cocky. Yeah, the sex was just sex, but there was more to their relationship then that. They talked, she shared her problems, and even in the smallest ways he made her feel better.

--

Spike and Riley steady themselves and take a moment to find their footing after having tossed a few punches around. Spike wipes the blood from his lip again and Riley composes himself.

"Buffy's right, we've got a mission to attend to. Let's just leave this… but if you cross us over in any way you better bet this will end with a stake in your heart," Riley says.

Spike thinks about replying with a cocky comeback. He even has a few on the tip of his tong that he knows would hit a nerve with Riley, but he fights the urge to say them. Spike chokes up his words and turns from Riley to continue down the tunnel.

"Wanker," he then says under his breath as he moves in the direction that Buffy and Sam went with Riley following him.

--

Buffy and Sam come to a split in the tunnel. They stop. The tunnel ends and there are two possible paths to take. Unsure of which way to go they wait for Spike and Riley to catch up, which they do within minutes. Both Sam and Buffy notice the silence between the guys, but there is something else there. There seems to be a silent truce as well. Buffy hopes that at least for the rest of their mission they find a way to be civil with each other.

"Spike, what way now?" Buffy asks.

"This way," Spike says as he takes the tunnel to the left. Buffy follows behind him and then Sam and Riley behind her. Their pace has picked up a little to make up for lost time and they walk steadily into the darkness.

--

The tunnel comes to an end. All that can be seen is the moonlight shining down through the man hole above, tiny particles of dust dance and twinkle in the blue light. Spike glances back at Buffy, and then looks up the man hole.

"Up we go," he says as he climbs up the ladder and out into the night. Buffy, Sam, and Riley follow behind him. When they emerge from the tunnel they find themselves in an alley across from the docks. They look around, but there's no one else in sight. The man hole is left uncovered as they try to decide what to do next.

"Now what?" Buffy asks as Spike looks around. He breathes in deep through his nostrils and finds the Doctors scent. He isn't far. Once Spike has the exact location in his mind he turns back to the crowd.

"This way," he says and they follow him.

Spike moves with stealth through the thin alleyway. A feint smell of smoke wafts through the air and Spike knows they'll soon find the Doctor. He slows down as he's about to round the corner of the brick building he's been walking beside. He can sense that the Doctor is leaning against the adjacent wall. He glances at Buffy who's walking behind him and gives her a look to explain the situation. She understands.

Quickly Spike flies around the corner and punches the demon on the other side before he even has a chance to see it coming. The Doctor falls to the ground. He has human like features with a milky translucent skin and jet black eyes. His fingers are twice as long as those of an average human and his hair twists and curls in black loops going down the center of his head like a Mohawk.

"Spike," the demon slurs with a snake like lisp as Buffy, Sam and Riley come around the corner.

"Agent Finn…" Sam says.

"On it," Riley responds as he moves toward the Doctor.

Buffy and Spike watch as Riley and Sam apprehend the demon before them. Riley shoots him with a stun gun causing his body to shake in pain then Sam restrains him with handcuffs. She lifts the Doctor to his feet and Riley pulls out his radio.

"The Doctor has been detained, he's still alive," Riley says into the hand held radio.

"Check, wait for pickup, we've already got the eggs," a fuzzy voice says from the other line.

"You're taking him with you?" Buffy asks.

"Yeah, I thought you understood that," Riley says.

"This is a reconnaissance and recovery mission," Sam adds.

"The Doctor's been trading in the black market, we need to interview him and find out what else he's been selling."

"Right, and by interview you mean experiment," Spike says with anger evident in his voice.

"You're a traitor Spike," the doctor chimes in.

"Shut up."

"Riley, you have the eggs… I understand that, but this… I'm sorry, but I just don't believe in experimenting on demons and I don't trust the government… look what they did with Adam. Demons should be killed, end of story," Buffy says.

"Right… demons should be killed, that's why you work along side one."

"That's different Riley…"

"It doesn't matter Buffy, we're taking the Doctor end of story."

Before another word can be said Spike walks up to the doctor.

"Sorry mate," he says as he puts his hands on either side of the demons face and twists causing the creature's neck to snap. Riley, Sam, as well as Buffy are stunned. The Doctor falls to the ground limp and lifeless and Sam looks down at the limp body that lies at her feet.

"Now be a good little tin soldier and march on home… I may have been up to help you take out the Doc, but I'm not gonna let you blokes stick little chip whatnots in his brain or what have you," Spike says with a shooing motion of his hands.

"Spike, do you realize what you've just done, the whole country could be at risk…" Riley replies.

"I don't bloody care, find you're info another way, I'm not helping you torture any of my buddies."

"No you'd just kill them."

"Riley. I agree with him, and I think it's time for you to leave," Buffy says stepping in between Riley and Spike.

He glances down at her for a moment. Then there is a stir in the sky. The wind starts to blow heavy and a bright spotlight appears. All heads look up to the sky to see a helicopter fly above them. It slows to a hover just above the four of them and then lowers a ladder to the ground. Buffy averts her gaze from the helicopter in the sky to look Riley in the eyes once more. She glares at him with as much determination and slayer strength as she can portray. He gets the point. Without another word Riley turns and walks toward the ladder. Sam follows after him, but before she does she gives Buffy a sincere smile which Buffy returns. Then they're off. Within moments the helicopter has flown away and Buffy and Spike are left standing in the alley as if nothing happened.

Once the spotlight has vanished and the strong wind from the helicopter's blades have disappeared Buffy lets her guard down. Her shoulders fall, and she takes on a more comfortable stance as she turns to Spike. He looks her up and down. All angry thoughts of Riley and government experiments vanish from his mind. Now all Spike can focus on is the sight of Buffy before him. He takes a swaggering step forward and invades her space.

Buffy looks up at Spike as he's now mere inches from her face; she can feel the warmth and lust that's swarming between them. She wonders just how it is that he has this ability to make her forget everything around herself. One thing that doesn't escape her mind however is his actions earlier. How he helped her and did what was right even though it meant loosing a friend. He killed someone who, sure maybe he wasn't the best of buds with, but who he knew; and he did it to prevent something worse.

He leans in to kiss her and she leans in as well. As they their lips meet Sam's words flutter through her head. He makes me happy, she thinks to herself. Their kiss deepens and Spike runs his hand up Buffy's back arching her toward him. Then the lust hits her and all she can think about is… she stops herself. Spike can make her feel good, but when they're intimate it isn't the kind of feeling that's healthy. She breaks their kiss and her eyes flutter down to the ground. Spike is confused. Buffy takes a step back.

"What's wrong love?"

"Spike… I can't do this anymore."

"Shh, love…"

"No, Spike… I think… I think I'm… falling for you…"

"I'm not seeing the problem."

"And it's killing me… I really do care about you, but being with you like this, having to hide us; it makes things simpler for a little while…"

"I don't call five hours straight a little while."

"Spike, what we're doing, the sneaking around, the sex, it just isn't healthy, and it's not fair to you."

"Really not complaining here."

"I can't keep this secret anymore… I can't just use you for comfort when you mean more then that to me."

"So let's not hide anymore."

"Spike, you don't have a soul… they would never… I just can't. I'm sorry William. I care about you, but I don't know what to do here, I just know something has to change." Spike is speechless for a moment, he knows she's right. He may have her when she comes calling, but she never stays, she's not _really_ his.

"So let's start over."

"What?"

"Start over, we'll just take things slow… make it right."

I… I don't know, I have to think," Buffy's mind swarms with thoughts. Could she really have a healthy relationship with a vampire, with Spike? Would her friends ever understand. Then Buffy thinks about Sam's words and she realizes that she does want Spike around, that there is _something_ between them more then lust. "Maybe," Buffy says, and she does think that _maybe_ it could work. "I just, I need some time."

Buffy backs up from Spike, turns and leaves. Spike stands speechless and shocked in the alleyway as he listens to her footsteps echo in the night. He doesn't see the single tear that rolls down her face as she walks out of sight. He does, however, think about what she said. She's falling for him. If only Buffy could get over what her friends think about her and stop being miserable then they really could work; after all she gave him that 'maybe' that he'd been asking for since the very beginning.

Spike is upset over Buffy ending things with him, but he's also filled with more hope then he's ever gotten from her before. That 'maybe' means more to him then all the physical contact they've had rolled together. 'You don't have a soul', her words run through his head.

"Guess I'll have to remedy that," Spike says to himself as he stands alone in the alley. Then he turns and walks in the opposite direction of his crypt. He's not going to take his maybe for granted.

THE END.

--**EPILOGUE**--

Two days, exactly forty-eight hours; that was all Buffy was able to wait. She finds that she just can't stay away, but then again she never could. The slayer saunters through the graveyard in the direction of his crypt without even the slightest intention to patrol. Every step she takes she assures herself that she won't be sleeping with him, she won't use him, not again; but he's still the only one who understands her and she needs to talk to him. She needs to know how he is.

Buffy reaches her destination and stops dead in her tracks. For a moment she just stares at the door to his crypt observing how the moonlight shines upon it giving it a heavenly glow, then slowly opens it.

"Spike," she calls out softly into the candle lit room. No reply. She walks in. The crypt is empty; however the small T.V. that sits in the corner of the room is on and the sound from it reverberates through the room. He must be home, Buffy thinks to herself. She wanders over to the ladder to go down below, before she gets there however there is a noise from behind her. Buffy spins around immediately to look at the entrance of the crypt. Her hopes rise on high at the thought that she will be turning around to see Spike, but it's not him and her hopes fall.

"Ah… Oh, Buffy… hi," Clem says as he enters the crypt. He hadn't expected anyone to be there.

"Hi Clem… is Spike here?" Buffy says surprised to see the demon before her.

"Uh, no… he left a few nights ago."

"He left?" Buffy says in disbelief.

"Yeah… didn't even stop back here, just stopped by the bar and asked if I'd watch his place for a while."

"Well did he say how long he'd be gone… or where he was going," Buffy says desperate to know something.

"Nope… Oh, but he did give me something for you."

Buffy watches as Clem goes and shuffles through a pile of papers which he's set atop the T.V. Thoughts run wild her head. Why, where, because of me? She had wanted to do the right thing, but she had never wanted him to leave. Clem comes back with a white envelope in his hand and gives it to Buffy. She smiles at the demon as she takes it from him and looks down at her name which is written across the front in a cursive script.

"He didn't say what it was about… just that I should give it to you if you come around."

"Thanks," Buffy replies softly as she takes the letter out form the envelope and opens it. Her eyes flutter down to the paper as she reads the cursive words in the glow from the candlelight.

_I knew you couldn't stay away love, and I'm sorry I'm not there to greet you, but I've got something I need to do. I want to tell you what I've set off to do, but I think it's best if I keep it a secret until I know exactly how this is gonna go. I don't know how long I'll be gone, it might be quite a while and when I do get back things are gonna be different, you can be sure of that.  
I love you Buffy, and I know you deserve better then me. I will be back.  
Spike. _

A single tear falls down Buffy's face. Still all he could think about was being better for her. Can't he see that she isn't good enough for him? Buffy decides at that moment that when he gets back that she'd give them a chance to start over. She finds herself tired of doing what's right; when he gets back she's going to do what she wants.

--

Spike sits hidden in the dark hull of a cargo ship. His head tilts back leaning on the wall. It will be a long trip and a longer journey, and if he finds what he's looking for he will have ruthless trials to complete, but it will all be worth it in the end. It's what he needs to do for her, to be hers, to be what she needs. Spike knows that Buffy does care about him and that she's hiding behind excuses when it comes to being with him, but he also knows that she's right about him needing a soul. He'd never admit that to her and his demon would forever deny it, but somewhere in Spike he just knows that he'll never fully understand her without it. Spike closes his eyes and lets his thoughts drift to images of her and sounds of her voice. It's those thoughts that will get him through this.

THE END.


End file.
